Animus, and you

This topic has 19 replies, 19 voices, and was last updated 7 years, 8 months ago by Anonymous.

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    • #4933
       Winston Smith
      Participant

      So, there’s some talk that maybe the creators are deliberately trying to provoke conflict within the community. I’m not sure if that really rings true to me, but I don’t think it really matters, because the ultimate goal is the same in either case.

      Even *if* the creators are trying to provoke tension, or conflict within the community, they wouldn’t be doing it to destroy the community, they’d ultimately want to see the community “reborn from it’s ashes”, rise like a phoenix, and all that cliche crap. Whatever their immediate goals may be, their long term goal is to have a strong community, because that’s the only way this project can succeed. If this community is destroyed, then the entire experience is destroyed along with it, because the community is the heart and soul of this project. No fans, no show. It simply doesn’t make sense to deliberately destroy a community that you depend on. It’s so much easier to destroy a community than to build one. I just don’t think the creators intentions are that petty, that foolish, or that simple.

      If they *aren’t* deliberately provoking conflict within the community, then they’re probably sitting there shaking their heads in disappointment, wondering why we all can’t just get along.

      Either way, what they want at the end is a strong, resilient, connected, active community. Give it to them. We’re all going to faction up, choose sides, etc. There’s going to be some level of necessary tension between those factions, but there is absolutely no reason that things need to get mean, or hurtful. There is no reason to get upset at fellow participants, even if you think they don’t “get it.” Every person comes into this with their own perspective, and ultimately, is trying to have a good time, in their own way. If someone else gets chosen for something, be happy for them, watch their periscopes, and get what you can from the experience. It’s ok to feel a little disappointed, but getting upset about it isn’t going to change what already happened.

      Newbies come into the community, and they see an established core who appears to dominate the dialog. It can be intimidating, and difficult for a newbie to feel like they have enough of a clue to have something valuable to contribute to the discussion. It’s easy to walk away for 24 hours, and be confused when you come back. It’s easy to notice those core members getting more “attention”, and feel envious of it. Of course they do, they *worked* for it.

      If core community members appear to dominate the dialog, it’s not because they’re greedy, or exclusive. It’s because those are the people who are most deeply engaged, highly active, and often very involved with the immersive theater scene as a broader whole. They’re much more experienced, they put things together more quickly. They’re *good* at this, because they do it a lot. They *EARN* their experience through hard work. When they figure things out, they share those things with other people who are as involved as they are. When those core community members are asked to do something like write down 5 names, of COURSE they’re going to write down the names of people they are more familiar with, or close to. From the outside, this can appear to be a clique, even if it’s really not. They’re not selfish for writing down names of people they know.

      So, here’s the point. If you want a strong community, YOU are responsible for building it. YOU are responsible for defending it, even against yourselves. YOU are responsible for being inclusive, and understanding towards newbies. YOU are responsible for keeping your envy in check when other people get chosen for things that you would have liked, even when it seems like the same people are being chosen again and again. Look at the contributions those people make to the community. That’s why they get chosen. YOU are responsible for not allowing a wedge to be driven between yourselves, and your fellow participants, even when you’re aligned to opposite factions.

      In *any* community of sufficient size, there will be people that you don’t really mesh with. If you become antagonistic towards each other, you’re hurting the community as a whole, not helping it. Conflict is cancer to an online community. If you don’t eliminate it, then it *will* eliminate you. The Internet is littered with the bloated, stinking corpses of communities that didn’t figure this out. If your community lives long enough, it *will* get conflict-cancer. Whether the community survives the experience or not depends on whether those inevitable conflicts can be resolved amicably, without a schism. There is room under this tent for all kinds of different ideas, perspectives, and methods of interaction. When someone does something that doesn’t jive with you, just let it go. They’re just having fun their own way, doing their own thing. If you want to roll your eyes privately, go for it, but don’t be a dick to people who are just trying to have a good time. When you encounter people at work that you dislike, for whatever reasons, if you engage in conflict with that person, ultimately, you will both lose. The same is true here. If you engage in conflict with other participants, you’re losing the game.

      If this “thing” is going to succeed over the long run, it *requires* broad participation. It *cannot* just be a handful of extremely dedicated contributors, because you don’t have a successful show, selling tickets to a few dozen people.

      When someone comes in here, and tries to divide the community, whether it’s intentional or not, don’t be a jerk, just refuse to allow it to happen. Maybe they’re real participants, maybe they’re shadow people, maybe they’re characters stirring shit for effect, maybe they’re difficult, maybe they’re parents who just don’t understand. YOU make the choice as to how you react to those situations. Strong communities come together. Weak communities fracture and splinter. Be strong, not weak. Do the hard thing. Be excellent to each other, especially when you disagree. You are not obligated to engage in a conflict just because it’s there offering itself to you, even if it seems to be the creators that are offering it.

      It’s ok to play the game, it’s ok to be in opposition to each other. It’s not ok to make enemies of each other, or tear each other down.

      When they give Julie the option to choose herself, or 5 other people to attend an event, don’t be upset at her for making a choice. THEY put her in that position, and forced her to make it. If you want to be upset at someone for it, be upset at the people who put her in that position. Let’s say she chose the 5 people instead of herself. Doesn’t it seem likely that she would be “rewarded” for that too at some point, in some way? They want people to enjoy their experience, they’re not going to just shaft her, and say “Thanks, Julie, those 5 people get an experience, you get to fuck off and go home.” Maybe they’ll make it look like that, but they’re ultimately going to remember that someone made the “altruistic” choice, and give them something for it. When she chooses herself, it’s natural for those 5 people to feel a little disappointed, but it didn’t take very long for the creators to give those 5 people a little love anyway, did it? The creators want to involve you, even when/if it looks like they’re excluding you. Why wouldn’t they, YOU are the reason they’re doing this in the first place.

      This isn’t actually about turning people against each other, it just *LOOKS* that way. It is your responsibility to see through it, and do the good thing. You’re not supposed to see Noah-ness as something to aspire to, or emulate. You’re supposed to recognize it for the destructive cancer that it is, burn it to the fucking ground, and build something beautiful in its place.

    • #4942
       Bryan Bishop
      Participant

      Epic read, @winstonsmith, and well said. Co-sign.

    • #4946
       Anonymous
      Inactive

      TL;DR:

      Be excellent to each other, especially when you disagree.

      View post on imgur.com

    • #4948
       Anonymous
      Inactive

      Agreed

    • #4949
       Melissa
      Participant

      It’s ok to play the game, it’s ok to be in opposition to each other. It’s not ok to make enemies of each other, or tear each other down.

      ^

      Thiiiiiis.

    • #4951
       Addison
      Participant

      I wish there was a way to sticky posts, because this is required reading. Thank you for posting this @winstonsmith

    • #4952
       Mike
      Participant

    • #4953
       thehazelverse
      Participant
    • #4956
       Anonymous
      Inactive

      Bra-fucking-vo, @winstonsmith

    • #4957
       Cristen
      Participant

      Preach, my man. I am new but everyone has been lovely and helpful and I very much enjoy the lot of you.

    • #4958
       thehazelverse
      Participant
    • #4959
       Russell
      Participant

      Thank you, @winstonsmith

    • #4960
       Maranda
      Participant

      Beautifully said. Thank you.

    • #4962
       Meghan Mayhem
      Participant

    • #4963
       Julie R Goldstein
      Participant

      This is beautiful and should be required reading…

      I also want to mention I’ve spoken since to every single person on the list I was forced to make and I’ve gotten nothing but compassion and admiration. They all know I put their names on that list because I love and care for them. I thought I was rewarding them for the kindness and dedication they’ve shown this community. I would NEVER knowingly hurt or punish a member of this community regardless of how much we may disagree at times.

      Let’s not give the OSDM the satisfaction. Let’s make it as hard as fucking possible for them to try and divide us.

    • #4967
       monkeymuffin333
      Participant

      Excellently stated @winstonsmith

      This has salvaged my hope for the future.

    • #4989
       Megan
      Participant

      Late to this but yes, thank you @winstonsmith.

    • #4991
       Lawrence Meyers
      Participant

      Well done, Winston.

    • #5056
       Andrew K
      Participant

      Awesome post @winstonsmith – totally agree with you.

      I wonder- are the powers that be (Noah, OSDM, etc) dividing us into “winners” and “losers” only to force us to find common ground so that we may come back together to conquer? Break us down (or apart) and build us back up again, as a new stronger community?

      @thebuz @shankfx22 @thegilded – thoughts?

    • #5061
       Anonymous
      Inactive

      Agreed, 100%. As a newbie and unable to partake in any of the in person events, it is interesting to see the rifts and how they are shifting. So in that respect, I have more of an outsider’s/impartial view. I am neither a “winner” or a “loser”. I can hope that some of my input can be useful, despite being in another hemisphere but I understand that my inability to be there in person reduces my “usefulness” when it comes to the ARG. I am amazed and in awe of how such intense experiences can bring people together into such a tightly knit community. So yes, by all means take sides, but please don’t let that slowly destroy the friendships and bonds you’ve made along the way.

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