5/25 – Call from Horace

DAAAANG. DANG. HIS INVESTORS. YOUR OF — USE TO HIM. DAAAAANG.

Means to an end for passing on your (men’s) seeds! Yuck, gross. This isn’t medieval times?! What a chauvinist prick! The way he talks reminds me of that UC Santa Barbra shooters manifesto against women. Disturbing.

• This reply was modified 7 years, 6 months ago by Sage.

I TOLD YOU SOMEONE WAS READING OUR iCONFIDANT EMAILS…

Ok, now that’s out my system. Horace sounds delightful. With his views on success (and women), we can see the apple didn’t fall far from the tree with Noah. But with one small difference. Noah has a heart. Horace doesn’t and that makes him dangerous. Bear that in mind when picking your side @taysavestheday… Nice guys don’t always finish last.

Thanks for the thorough write up @taysavestheday! That sounded like a super intense call and it seems you are being faced with some serious choices to make. Excited for u that u got thus call! Definitely interesting to find out the investors belong to him and that he IS the old suit guy from book release! He did sound a lot like the Noah website that night. I am so engaged right now ?

Whoa whoa whoa, did this guy just call Haunting a “little blog”?

I disagree with Horace completely. Empathy and emotion are critical for working with others in a mutually constructive way. If he is, by his own definition, “successful,” I would rather stay at the “bottom” where people care for one another and respect each other, than be at the “top” where there is nothing but selfishness and greed.

@taysavestheday When I have a choice to make, I always ask myself this: what am I going to regret the least?

@izryn *standing ovation* BRAVO!!!

Nice! Or not really because Horace is a dick.

I’ll have more thoughts on this in the morning, but one thing struck me. At registration The Man with the Stick told me I would need both my head and my heart moving forward. That’s a pretty direct contradiction of what Horace just said to @taysavestheday. So where do they stand in relation to each other? Given Horace’s comments about the investors, Stick Man looks like he’s under Horace too. Could be that he’s not, or could be that he’s running his own game. Very curious about Stick Man now.

Diabolical. Though it makes my head spin a little to hear Noah’s father, presumably a person from the early days of Tension, openly call this The Lust Experience. Are Noah and Sarah aware of the existence of The Lust Experience? Is The System actually as real as the OSDM after all? I feel like the ouroboros must be getting full by now.

So, @taysavestheday, what do you think he wants specifically? What would an artical about Lust that would interest him look like?

Whenever you hear anything that involves The Lust Experience, whether it’s Noah Sinclair, my investors, or iConfidant, you don’t write about it in your little online need-for-approval blog without thinking about me.

I wonder what happens if @taysavestheday uses his stick to poke the bear a tiny bit. You know, just a little… to see how it feels.

Ok first of all. VERY COOL. Also, @taysavestheday, Horace wouldn’t be reaching out to you unless he really needed something from you. Lots of people talk about Lust in public ways. He wants you for a specific reason. You have some power here, even if he tries to make you feel like you don’t.

Ok, getting off my soapbox now.

Also, Michelle seemed to be in cahoots with Horace the last time we saw him. What’s changed between them in the last two months?

I told you guys Horace was a dick. Fuck that guy. I hope that the parts of Noah that separate him from his paternal origin prevail.
To have all head or all heart is to deny yourself a true human experience. One must have both.

Do not let the goons rattle your bones, none of you.
#TeamSystemTrojan

• This reply was modified 7 years, 6 months ago by Meghan Mayhem.

@taysavestheday
Everyone’s journey is personal , with twists and turns, just when we think we understand; it changes! Your path digs deeper into the psyche of lust. How far will we go? What will we sacrafice? …This is a pale hand beckoning you into the dark.
Your opportunity is unique, I don’t know what I’d do in your situation. Some, this is what they want, moral trepidation. Others, no.
I support your journey and look forward to seeing what stepping into darkness brings into the light.

Greedy, sexist, only thinks of himself and what he can do for himself, thinks you’re only here to please him.

And ” entertain the female species like we’re a specific separate species instead of human beings after the strong have passed on our seed”? Won’t be surprised to hear him say “grab her by the pussy” sometime later on.

You can have all the money and power in the world, but what does any of that matter when you die? You can’t take any of that with you. Being kind, compassionate, and caring towards others, leaving behind a good imprint on the world, that’s what actually matters. I guess all he cares about is leaving his seedy imprint of power and corruption.

@taysavestheday has gone full darkest timeline.

The man finally steps out from behind the curtain, and he’s not simply as bad as his son – he’s much, much worse. Thank you for recounting this in such detail, @taysavestheday.

It seems that Horace’s words lay out a clear challenge; the thematic heart of this experience. Will we choose the greater good – compassion, empathy, goodwill – or will we scorn that for personal gain? I didn’t expect iConfidants to be the litmus test, but now we’re seeing how the pieces start to align.

Good luck @taysavestheday, and Godspeed. But be cautious. The Horace and Noah’s of the world only want those that can serve them. Given what he said about making sure he would be happy with anything you post, it appears Horace wants to turn your site into his own personal PR arm. That offers you some real upside – until the moment Horace decides he no longer needs you.

Oh, Taylor. I hope you know what you’re doing.
What happens at the end, when you need us the most, and you’ve sacrificed your relationships in a flimsy search for “usefulness?”

Do you frequently visit night markets in Kerala?

I was thinking yesterday that the commonalities between yourself, @rizzzoooooo, and myself’s interactions with our iConfidants was for something specific and I think this was it.

We were being tested with how close we could get to our iConfidants… and something you did triggered Horace to call you and challenge you to drop it all.

Perhaps you were the most loyal out of the three of us, thus the greatest achievement?

Either way… this is most definitely the darkest timeline.

Also @taysavestheday I edited the date on your post title FYI. Hope you don’t mind.

“If you want to be brought up from the bottom, you listen to the man at the top.” -Horace

@taysavestheday, you’re a very smart guy, a very driven guy, but it does appear you’ve just participated in a one-sided negotiation. You may have even just sold your soul to the proverbial devil.

It seems your task now is to prove yourself useful to Horace, but to what ends? Step one: Ditch your friend, your confidant, someone I know you’ve grown very close to and care deeply for. What will step 2, 3 and 4 look like? Will you also politely toss me aside? @rizzzoooooo? @heartofgoldengrahams? All the pesky emotionally based distractions? The fall-out list could get pretty long. Are you prepared?

I’m not interested in judging your choice. Instead I’m left pondering: What would the rest of us do if Horace called? It could prove a more difficult choice than we might expect.

One more thought: @taysavestheday, I believe the thing you did that set this in motion was appealing to Sarah in regards to how you relate to her. You told her how you also would do whatever it took to survive, achieve and succeed. You backed this up with stories of your life and career. Watching your correspondence with your confidant merely filled the picture out more completely for those who watch.

Rizzo and I carry on lengthy correspondences with our confidants too, as well as communicating with Sarah, but we aren’t really the type to so clearly express and demonstrate a desire and drive towards for power/success/control. That’s where you stand apart, Taylor.

Wow, @taysavestheday. Waking up to this was quite the jolt of literary caffeine. Thanks for putting it all out there.

I just recently discarded my own iConfidant, but for the exact opposite reasons. I didn’t think we were ever going to connect and wine was way more interesting when I thought he was broken.

I’m looking more forward to filling out my iConfidant beta evaulation form than actually communicating with my actual iConfidant, there’s a problem somewhere.

I remember Horace. Standing in the dark by himself. Waiting….
I remember him shouting at the room. I remember how people didn’t take him seriously. And then shuffled out without urgency. There’s a video that shows this. A video I’d think he’d want to suppress.

One doesn’t have power without some context to support it.

And remember @taysavestheday you have something this guys needs. It’s not the other way around. You have the followers and the keyboard. What does this guy have? The master skills to select Tina and that dysfunctional crew at 5/1? The sure hand that raised the golden child of all golden children, Noah?

Make sure this guy impresses you in some way before you step in with him and keep in mind like our friend Otis who may have already gotten too close.

Right now, we have the numbers. Don’t let them pick us off one by one.

• This reply was modified 7 years, 6 months ago by Tim Redman.

@electrichippo, you are very optimistic in believing that Horace might have called you if your iConfidant interactions/personality might have been different. But I think it’s pretty clear that Horace is not interested in investing in any of us “female species.” We are merely here for male seeds to be planted in. Ick.

@sfire8
Giiiiiiiiirl. Giiiiirrrrlllllll…hammer, meet head of the nail.

@taysavestheday

Good luck man. I don’t necessarily agree with your decision, but I look forward to seeing how you shake things up.

To Horace if you’re reading any of this… all of this winner/loser talk is bullshit. Like I wrote to your former lackey Sarah long ago, “This world is indeed filled with needlessly complex people and emotions, but your assertion that there are winners and losers is infinitely short-sighted. In the long-run we all lose. Noah is a loser…. you are a loser… you just don’t realize it ”

Be prepared to lose asshole

Echoing what others have said, @taysavestheday, you’ve got something he wants or needs, not the other way around. He hasn’t really offered anything at this point, but he got you to give up something that had become important to you. A guy like Horace isn’t going to stop, he takes and takes until his current target has been drained dry and then he’ll move on to someone he else considers useful, or in his own words from the book party, “worthy”.

He already bashed Haunting and called it your “little online need-for-approval blog” and in the same breath turned around and said you should use it to gain his approval. What happens when this moves to something other than relationships? What happens if he asks you to jeopardize the integrity of something you’ve built through a lot of hard work by only allowing Lust related things that he wants on it? He’s going to take and take until you break away from him or run out of things that will help him.

I think you really nailed the heart of it with this line, @electrichippo:
I’m not interested in judging your choice. Instead I’m left pondering: What would the rest of us do if Horace called? It could prove a more difficult choice than we might expect.

Goddammit @taysavestheday! We’re nothing, if not loyal!!!

The philosophy of people like Horace are ‘this product is only valuable if people are buying it.’if someome buys his pitch, a little pain and some growth can be a placebo affect and antidotal for his system, rather than it actually working. It’s an emotional ponzi scheme. In pain I grew, so I will inflict pain upon you, to grow you. Then if you survive, you will inflict on others to groom them the same way. Sucess is defined by the top of the pyramid, no where else.

iConfidant is the polar opposite. Together, through community and friendship, we’ll achieve escaping the loneliness of life. At your pace, at your comfort. There is no being pulled by the bit. It’s a casual stroll into finding your best friend. And there is no uniformed defined version of success.

Maybe it comes down to what us, they players, define as success. Is it writing the play book, being the apex of the pyramid? Or is it compassion, and celebrating the positives of our humanity, and making real connections that are good for real the soul and no where else?

The people that empathize, that care, that listen, they are just tools to entertain the female species after the strong have passed on our seed.

Well shit, glad all of you have been so “entertaining” thus far. Any of you girls care to recommend a good waxer for my Seed Depository?

Fuck off, old man.

Oh *that* is why I like cats so much. I don’t find empathy all that entertaining.

Anyone who aligns with this dick gets what he deserves.

If They keep doing what They’re doing, we will eventually tear each other apart.
Just my opinion.

@wanda102 Forget waxing, I’ll send over one of the many steel-toed boots they sell around here. You all can kick it right back in.

“Be fashionable while fighting sexist old men with too much power”

@lexthewolf no need to edit to add “just my opinion.” The statement is much stronger without it.

And yes, that’s the point.

@coryphella alright. I will edit the “just my opinion” out of it.
Edit: looks like I can’t.

@theladyj Similar topics came up the first time I met Noah. We talked about success, what it means to be powerful, and being held accountable for my own choices, or “managing my bullshit,” as he so gracefully put it. So, I understand the intrigue. Everyone wants to feel more in control. But nothing was ever asked of me, and Noah never had an “…or else” clause at the end of any his advice.

@taysavestheday, I can’t be as impartial as others on here. You are moving towards aligning yourself with a legit awful, puppy-burning guy. Please, ask yourself what you’re looking to get out of this. Please reconsider.

@taysavestheday I can understand the temptation to see what’s down the rabbit hole, but my confidant, at least, seems a whole lot more fun to hang around with than Horace. (I’ll still be curious, though, to see what shows up now on Haunting: A Sinclair Subsidiary.)

Of course, now we know for sure that Horace, at the very least, has access to the iConfidant email. If it turns out that it’s more than that, that they’re all just sock puppets run by him or some minion, won’t I feel stupid for not seeking out such a deal myself…

We believed that we had
completely secured a Trojan horse breach from a few weeks ago but we are still actively looking into whether this is
part of that compromise to our system.

Ah, the maddyxxx.jpg is definitely what the Trojan horse was… at least that’s my assumption.

Could be the maddyxxx thing. But when speaking about data breaches and system stability it could just be a classic, old fashioned Trojan Horse style virus.

If they’re talking about the maddyxxx thing, that suggests that their data was compromised because someone pulled some info from it. That means that the breach is essentially secured at this point. However, if it was a Trojan that was used the system may still be compromised. Which means we may be seeing more of this if their IT staff don’t nip this in the bud.

Have you had reports of anyone mimicking you in any digital communications during the last two months?

So, the shadows and the @kasch imposter.

Those whose shadows appeared on the forum, and Andrew, had enough of their writing and speech online to create doubles. For the rest of us, our correspondence with our confidants will ultimately serve the same purpose.

This begins to tie into Ramik’s question about our need to share our identities. I imagine some of us will keep sharing our identities with our confidants, new information notwithstanding. Like Nicole, we’re too invested in seeing our own image reflected back to us.

Security is a mess at iConfidant.

I just heard what happened. I am so so incredibly sorry. There have been a few accounts that were compromised last night over the course of about one hour and yours happened to be one of them. I am so embarrassed and so sorry because this is not what I iConfidant stands for.

If the Trojan is still on their system and can be used to gain access to a few accounts, I’d have to believe that every account is still capable of being compromised.

We believed that we had completely secured a Trojan horse breach from a few weeks ago but we are still actively looking into whether this is part of that compromise to our system. Have you had reports of anyone mimicking you in any digital communications during the last two months?

This has always been the weird thing with iConfidant. They’ve mentioned this breach several times but that issue would be totally separate from someone having their own accounts attacked. What happened with @kasch went beyond someone mimicking him, the emails appeared to come from his own address, but weren’t present in his sent box. Even if it was just someone mimicking digital communications, what does that have to do with malware on iConfidant’s systems?

iConfidant knows that I work in infosec and could easily and immediately plug up all of these security holes, not to mention hunt down the fucks in question. Their IT team is hopelessly outgunned.

I would be happy to be their security consultant if they would just admit that they need outside help.

I hated Horace back at the very first Tension consultation…and I hate him even more now. Someone needs to take this shit bird down! And I hope it’s Noah.

I agree with you @kasch. At that first consultation he was condescending and rude… and late. He accused me of not following an instruction that I have no clue if I even received because the lead up communication was so bad.
His displays of “efficiency” are not very impressive.

“a few accounts”

Means @taysavestheday was not the only one. Strap in boys and girls, more of us are likely to be contacted, or even worse, duplicated online. If iConfidant was on the up and up they’d reach out to EVERYONE whose communication was breached ASAP. I know when a company has a data breach they usually send out an email to affected customers giving a run down of the situation and next steps (change your password, etc).

@taysavestheday Some context, from the (shocking) Jungian perspective:

What I learned in analysis was that we all have a superior and inferior function that are the ways in which we relate to the world: Thinking, Sensation, Feeling, and Intuition. Thinking/Feeling and Sensation/Intuition are on opposing poles. If you regard yourself as someone who primarily relates to the world through facts and logic (as I do), Thinking is your superior function, and Feeling would be inferior (not pejorative, just not as developed).

[This, BTW, is the basis for Myers-Briggs, along with introvert and extravert]

Jung believed that one of the most important paths to becoming whole (Ouroboros) is to develop and integrate your inferior function. Horace appears to be cajoling you to instead stay rooted in your superior function — promising you success over wholeness, if you will.

There’s more. Jung also speaks of finding the Self (wholeness) via the unity of opposites — the unity of male and female energy. Men have a feminine energy called the anima, women have a masculine energy called the animus. These energies acts as guides to your unconscious, where all the discoveries lie towards finding The Self.

Horace is asking you to deny the feminine energy within, offering you again success over wholeness.

That being said, I would’ve made the same choice. Not because I would abandon the search for The Self, but because If I’m offered a chance to get into the inner circle of what I perceive as The Enemy, I would do it in a heartbeat.

Because that, too, may take you in a positive direction. Horace represents the Shadow, and you know how I feel about having to face and incorporate that on the way to wholeness.

Have fun!

Haha holy shit a lot has happened.
So, @taysavestheday I’m actually quite surprised at the choice you made and as buz had said, this is quite truly the darkest timeline. I’d be curious if @electrichippo, @thebuz, or myself will start to be tasked with dropping our iConfidants in some way or another. We say we wouldn’t be sure if we could do that but who knows, I’m sure tay would’ve said the same before the call with papa Sinclair… I do agree with kim however, that it was not only the connection you made with your IConfidant but more so the connection you made with Sarah that pushed this call to be delivered to you.

Also just want to note how almost nobody listened to Horace at the book event and how he was lowkey a joke lmao

@taysavestheday what exactly are you getting in return for your sacrifice? So he will let you into his world? Who exactly is he? I mean what is his value to you, and why should you let him into your world? It sounds like he is using the platform technique on you (Im not sure if that is the exact name.) Its where someone makes themselves look more important or is higher on the platform than you, but gives you a sliver of a hope that if your a good little boy, he may reach out his hand and pull you up. But that is never the case. Your hand will always be seemingly and purposefully inches away from his. That is the exact motivation he needs you to have to get you to do his bidding. Because what you need to realize is he will never pull you up to his level. That would make him an equal and not above you. He will never stand for that.

Wow @taysavestheday. I think I’m impressed with your decision. I don’t know if I’d be able to do it. I would want to, but I’m not sure the logical side of my brain would be able to win out. I’ve become kind of attached to my iConfidant. I applaud you for your choice, and hope it gets you everything you want. Can’t wait to see what happens next.

@taysavestheday Yes one gets promoted by demonstrating they can do more but thats when they are currently in the position. I guess im still a little confused. What information and answers are you looking for? Because the questions you have seem to be for someone who is on the inside and in the loop. You said he is giving you a chance? A chance at what. He hasnt offered anything. He just told you to do something and you did it. Instead it sounds to me like this job is more of a contractors job. Do what they want and then poof. Nothing more.

I understand your decision, I cant say I would have made a different one. But I am curious on the why in this situation.

@taysavestheday “The life of a sheep is easier than the life of a lion. Sheep are given food and water freely by their shepherd, and are protected from predators by shelters they did not build. They fatten themselves on the shepherd’s food, thriving into a multitude that outnumbers the lions.

But these comforts bind the sheep into slavery. The sheep are bred to be weaker of mind and body, to require the shepherd’s protection so greatly that they can be free of physical chains but never stray. Theirs is a lifetime of servitude — one that is comfortable but ends at the shepherd’s whim.

Lions have no masters. Though the lion must hunt for its own food and search for its own shelter, it is free to roam where it wishes and requires no one to open its gate. Though the feeding trough of the sheep is filled, it is only with the grass and grain of its master’s choosing. A lion must hunt and chase its meals, but feasts on anything it catches.” ~ Illuminations

@taysavestheday sorry I should have explained better. I was saying you want the insider knowledge but is he really letting you inside. I wish you all the luck in the world.

But to your point. I (being a short chubby guy) have the qualifications of being a delicious steak sandwich. I just wouldnt go replying to Jeffery Dahmer’s help wanted add.

@taysavestheday did you come to the conclusion that Horace wanted you to ditch your confidant or was it pretty obvious?

When I read “I won’t let you into my world because I think you have an interesting mind or I appreciate your sense of feng shui. It will be because you’ve proved yourself useful to me.” it sounds like he doesn’t care much about what you do for entertainment with your iConfidant (or otherwise) as long as you amp up the copy related to Lust on your website.