Are Your Feelings “In Game?”

[Tom Hite]

Most of us live in a state whereupon we are seeking to follow the path of least resistance. The vast and overwhelming majority of people are constantly trying to “fit in” – this, while having a certain cultural baggage of being a pejorative, however, should not necessarily be eschewed as a negative. There is overwhelming logical support for the benefit of being able to homogenize to a society and establish a position wherein you are capable of exerting your greatest sphere of influence. It makes sense on an evolutionary and psychological level.

The question must arise at some point, however: to what degree are we doing ourselves a disservice by always seeking this comfort?

There are many among us who were drawn into the arts because we sought to quell a certain longing from deep within, that whisper of a voice that told us “there’s something more, here…” – many (perhaps all) of us overcame a number of obstacles in order to follow that voice, and it seems sometimes, perhaps, that the challenge to keep following it leads only to further conflict and turmoil with the very boundaries and safe spaces we have constructed in order to maintain that sense of belonging and camaraderie. The struggle is real, my friends.

What seems to arise out of this conflict is a sort of a dialectic: you have the feelings of your immediate reaction to things, that inner-voice that tells you that you will be always be alone, and that there is ultimately no greater purpose than to claw and fight your way to the top of some hierarchy, some inner-circle which you must breach and cannibalize your way toward, finding the greatest source of power and becoming it; but you also have that stronger sense, that center which guides you toward the kind of future you imagine, that quiet impression that there may just be some sort of order in all this chaos, and that perhaps your desire to take and use others, to possess and to consume their words and actions so as to somehow improve your foothold, this desire is only a shadow of the hidden consequences of all we do. Somewhere, in the middle of all of this churning human drama, there is your agency.

Oftentimes, we are scared of the things we know must be true. We do not want to step from the comfort of our stable, known universe and traverse the boundary into uncertainty. There are so many reasons why this is perfectly understandable – we become vulnerable, we become isolated, we become… accountable.

However, it may be just this kind of danger that we need in order to lighten our hearts to the weight of a feather. It may just be this voice telling us where our freedom is which calls from above the exit to the cave, drawing us toward it to see a new light. A new dawn.

When you find that you react to something in a way that challenges you, run toward the challenge. When you find art that asks you to suspend your disbelief, you have no choice but to submit, for the test of your faith is found in its immersion within the refiner’s fire. If you want to find the truth, you must entertain all of the possibilities.

“In the cave you fear to enter lies the treasure you seek.” – Joseph Campbell

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