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After I recounted the Briarberg meeting:
That is probably the most powerful experience you’ve described to me since this whole process began. My opinion — every profound experience in our lives comes down to self-revelation. Probably the most profound revelation we can experience is the acknowledgment that we’ve surrendered our will to another person, cause, substance. Here I think the deeper revelation is you went in with your eyes open, possibly looking to surrender to indoctrination and ultimately to the anima projection you were hoping to find. Go even deeper and we all realize that every savior complex we project outward masks our desire to save ourselves. Salvation through willing indoctrination, eventual rebellion, and finally redemption through the heroic act of rescuing another from the same insidious evil. I don’t think Clint and Darren, or whomever is in charge, are trying to prove to you that this path is nothing but an empty suit. I think they’re telling you this path won’t lead to the place (they perceive) you need to be. I’m not sure I agree. Lingering on the path with an outward projection of your anima can have deadly consequences (I’ll tell you sometime how I’m still dealing with the last breaths of those consequences), but if you’re enjoying the journey, I say linger. Just get the lay of the land, and you’ll be all right.
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